Humor, šaljive slike/video...

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ziko
Postovi: 773
Pridružen/a: 12 vel 2009, 12:12
Spol: M
OS: ovisi o danu u tjednu...
Lokacija: Lošinj - Ljubljana...

Re: Humor, šaljive slike/video...

Post Postao/la ziko »

Markec je napisao/la: Voze se u autu električar, mehaničar i Bill Gates. Odjednom auto stane i ni makac.

Električar: Mislim da nešto ne štima sa strujom, treba provjeriti masu i osigurače.
Mehaničar: Mislim da je to nešto s mjenjačem, vjerojatno lamela ili druk-lager.
Bill: Mislim da trebamo zatvoriti sve prozore, izaći i opet ući.
dobar :D

ima jos jedan sa General Motorsom i Microsoftom:
Microsoft vs. General Motors

At a recent computer expo, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "General Protection Fault" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time GM introduced a new car, car buyers would have to learn to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
Software is like sex... it's better when it's free :D (Linus Torvalds quote)
:snoozer:
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zole052
Postovi: 9952
Pridružen/a: 12 tra 2008, 22:45
Spol: M
OS: Manjaro/Endevour
Lokacija: Rijeka

Re: Humor, šaljive slike/video...

Post Postao/la zole052 »

Evo ga jedan malo zesci...

Pita sin tatu: Tata, tata a kako izgleda vagina?
Tata: O sine... vagina prije sexa izgleda kao predivan cvijet... mirisa po najfinijem prfemu...
Sin: Tata, tata a kako izgleda vagina poslje sexa?
Tata: Ah... sine... si mozda ikada vidio buldoga kako jede majonezu???
Nije teško biti toliko nesrećan da bi čovek počeo da pije. Ljude treba odvikavati od nesreće, a ne od alkohola. Nesreća je veći porok.
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ziko
Postovi: 773
Pridružen/a: 12 vel 2009, 12:12
Spol: M
OS: ovisi o danu u tjednu...
Lokacija: Lošinj - Ljubljana...

Re: Humor, šaljive slike/video...

Post Postao/la ziko »

zole052 je napisao/la:Evo ga jedan malo zesci...

Pita sin tatu: Tata, tata a kako izgleda vagina?
Tata: O sine... vagina prije sexa izgleda kao predivan cvijet... mirisa po najfinijem prfemu...
Sin: Tata, tata a kako izgleda vagina poslje sexa?
Tata: Ah... sine... si mozda ikada vidio buldoga kako jede majonezu???
rofl rofl rofl rofl
Software is like sex... it's better when it's free :D (Linus Torvalds quote)
:snoozer:
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dalibor.klobucaric
Postovi: 1278
Pridružen/a: 17 ožu 2008, 09:35
Spol: M
OS: ubuntu 16
Lokacija: Čakovec
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Re: Humor, šaljive slike/video...

Post Postao/la dalibor.klobucaric »

Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Person asked the young programmer, "And what starting salary were you looking for?"

The programmer said, "In the neighborhood of $75,000 a year, depending on the benefit's package."

The HR Person said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years - say, a red Corvette?"

The programmer sat up straight and said, "Wow!!! Are you kidding?"

And the HR Person said, "Certainly, ...but you started it."


http://www.computerjokes.net/
Because Open Source Matters
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zole052
Postovi: 9952
Pridružen/a: 12 tra 2008, 22:45
Spol: M
OS: Manjaro/Endevour
Lokacija: Rijeka

Re: Humor, šaljive slike/video...

Post Postao/la zole052 »

Nije teško biti toliko nesrećan da bi čovek počeo da pije. Ljude treba odvikavati od nesreće, a ne od alkohola. Nesreća je veći porok.
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dalibor.klobucaric
Postovi: 1278
Pridružen/a: 17 ožu 2008, 09:35
Spol: M
OS: ubuntu 16
Lokacija: Čakovec
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Re: Humor, šaljive slike/video...

Post Postao/la dalibor.klobucaric »

zole052 je napisao/la:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bt9xBuG ... r_embedded
Lolčina
Because Open Source Matters
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Markec
Postovi: 3865
Pridružen/a: 30 sij 2008, 14:55
Spol: M
OS: neodlučan
Lokacija: Croatia/Zagorje

Re: Humor, šaljive slike/video...

Post Postao/la Markec »

Jeste li čuli za francuza Remija Gaillarda :) tip je lud radi svakakve gluposti, upade itd
ajde gledajte Rocky-a
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hqOBR_Xbw2I&feature=fvst

Duga kolona na cesti, pitam se što to zadržava promet :D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gHCxdlZ7G18

Jeste li igrali igru pacman (ja jesam :) ali ne takvu kao na video)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIrvpn3k9A4

Često radi i upade (obavezno pogledati )
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x5usrvT8Hfc

Trčanje i razni sportovi
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S4ZO2FD4 ... re=channel

Astronaut
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GAONkS06 ... re=related

Gimastika
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9ApRjtw ... re=channel

Ima ih još pun youtube :)
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madone
Postovi: 1594
Pridružen/a: 09 srp 2008, 09:49
Spol: M
OS: Debian
Lokacija: Zagreb

Re: Humor, šaljive slike/video...

Post Postao/la madone »

Malog morskog psa učio je tata kako se lovi ljude...

- Kad vidiš kupača kojeg hoćeš pojesti, prvo napneš leđa da ti
Izviri peraja, pa okružiš oko njega...Nakon toga ga malo gurneš
njuškom, pa opet otplivaš jedan krug oko njega. Onda opet gurneš njuškom pod
rebra i otplivaš još koji krug, barem 4-5 puta... a onda ga zgrabiš i
pojedeš.

Mali morski pas pita tatu
- A zašto ga ne bih mogao odmah pojesti?

Tata mirno odgovori
- Možeš i tako, ali onda ti bude pun govana!
The Acacia Strain
Postovi: 1464
Pridružen/a: 12 kol 2008, 00:06
Spol: M

Re: Humor, šaljive slike/video...

Post Postao/la The Acacia Strain »

Amerikanka je u Budimpešti rentala Citroen C4 . Vozila je u mjesto udaljeno 220 Km.
Mislila je da je mjenjač automatski, pa se cijelim putem vozila u prvoj brzini.
Slike poklopca motora i unutrašnjosti motornog prostora su stvarne.
slika
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preneseno s jednog foruma
DebianResources
DebianHandbook
devil je napisao/la:nije neka tamo kanta pametnija od nas tu.
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shicy
Postovi: 8905
Pridružen/a: 28 lip 2009, 22:49
Spol: M
OS: Slackware

Re: Humor, šaljive slike/video...

Post Postao/la shicy »

@Acacia...nije ovo neki naročiti humor...više :shock:
:D
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